You Can RISE ABOVE YOUR COMPETITION…with behaviors that build leadership, confidence, class and authority.

In today’s competitive business environment, good sense and everyday manners can make the difference between getting ahead and being left behind. Why? Because all forms of etiquette affect others…including clients, colleagues, suppliers and friends.

Many colleges teach ethics, but few teach business etiquette. As objective as many of us like to feel that we are, the fact is that even in business relationships, we still judge people by how they act, speak, look and write.

Our outward appearance, demeanor and ability to communicate directly affects our on- and off-the-job performance. It also differentiates us from the competition– often the defining reason one person is chosen over another.

Business Etiquette enables us to have confidence in variety of settings with people from all walks of life, whether in meetings, sales calls, the golf course, or dining.

A Professional Image and manner gives us a psychological advantage over how people see us.They may think “if you care that much about yourself, manner, communication skills and demeanor, I feel comfortable that you will also take good care of my business too.  Good manners grease the wheels of society and  make people want to know us better.

Remember, in that first seven seconds of meeting someone, they are making numerous judgments about us, whether correct or not. They make assessments about our self-esteem, outlook on life, economic and educational levels, trustworthiness, social position and our future success. In my next video, I’ll show you just how powerful those signals can be!

Oh, those silent signals are speaking so loudly!

Kinesics is the study of body language and non-verbal communication pioneered in the 1950’s. Researchers discovered powerful signals displayed in the business world. Non-verbal signals are the most honest (unconscious) form of communications because they show what is really on our mind regardless of what is coming out of our mouth. Reading these signals helps us form our responses. Example: If someone says something nice but their body is stiff or their eyes show frustration or anger, everything is NOT fine. Follow up; with a question such as “You seem concerned. Please tell me how you feel/what you’re thinking/your ideas, etc.”

Communications – 55% of your message is non-verbal ( how you look, act, sit stand, enter a room, posture, movements & gestures, handshake, what do with hands).  38% is comprised of the quality of your voice (expression, pitch & tone). Studies throughout the years have shown, surprisingly, that only about 7% of our message interpretation is the actual words used. Body signals and HOW we say it have incredible power (or not, depending on what we do with our appearance, mannerisms and tone).

Benefits Giving positive, confident and engaged signals makes a big impact towards increasing sales, making you more approachable and believable. Negative signals (frustration, angst, control, indifference) repel people, and give them the impression you may not be as effective or honest as what they want/need in order to build a relationship with. Use their signals consciously to read what other’s are REALLY saying to help frame your response. Words should match body language. Pay attention to sudden changes in posture, expression or other cues. Why? Sudden change in movement usually show that you hit a nerve so go back and think about what was just said and…either explain it again…or change directions.

Different cultures & countries – The same gesture may have an entirely different meaning to someone from another country. A positive signal in one country may be vulgar in another. Use caution and WATCH their reactions carefully, adjusting as necessary.

By Watching job candidate or business prospect – you can often discern how aggressive they really are, whether they willcome across as obnoxious or personable, shy or feels inferior to others.…and most importantly, their attitude and motivation.

Entice individuals to hire or buy from you, not repel. When someone enters a room, it can color the meeting indelibly before a single word is spoken (energetic & lively, angry w/dark cloud, pleasant yet serious & professional). Is someone saying “yes” but closing themselves up with a foot bounding towards door? Profile! It works!

Only part of message – (crossed arms – cold? Or defensive.  If teemed with lack of eye contact, they are distancing selves. Slamming the door shut says they are unhappy, just not why! Non-verbal signals can’t solve problems or sell product by themselves so follow up with a verbal query, especially if there is a SUDDEN change in demeanor. Reading body signals really works!

My next blog will discuss powerful techniques to communicate positively and professionally!

Rita Rocker – Personal and career transformation consultant and rapid results coach, international author, national speaker, Transformation Academy



Leave a reply