Imagine that each person has a cup. How they feel—their emotional state, health, wellbeing, fulfillment, their energy level—is dependent on how full their cup is. Every person as the ability to pour from their own cup into someone else’ by giving of themselves in one way or another. There are some people who are cup-fillers, helpers, givers who go around filling others’ cups. There are also people who are like beggars on the street holding out empty cups asking or demanding them to be filled.
Sometimes the givers give too much. Their cups run on empty. They sacrifice themselves for others. They get drained, the feel empty, lethargic, stressed. Eventually they have no more to give. In some cases they become incapacitated or even pass away, leaving behind any number of people who believe they required that person in order to fill their cup.
And this all happens because of one big misunderstanding. Each person is 100% responsible for and capable of filling their own cup. Now, that doesn’t mean that people are always taking responsibility for it—many people going around with their cup out looking for handouts
For the beggars, the good news is that they are more than able to fill their own cups. Often, when dependent people are forced to stop being dependent, a miraculous thing happens—they step up to the plate.
There is good news for the givers too; they can learn how to fill their own cups. There is a better way… no matter who you are, you need to learn to feed yourself, take care of your self. Do things that bring you joy, utilize your natural talents, or put you in a state of flow. Go for a walk or spend time in nature. For some people, filling their cup is reading a book or playing a game or going to a show or listening to music or creating art. Remember what fills YOUR cup and do more if it! Not only will you no longer feel dependent on anyone else to fill your up, but your cup will run over and you’ll have more to give.
What are some ways you could fill your own cup? What FEEDS you? What makes you feel fulfilled?
What changes could you make that would stop beggars from being dependent on your filling of their cups?
If you commit to filling your own cup, how will this change your life?
By Natalie Rivera
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